Featured
How to rebuild trust in a relationship after an affair
How to rebuild trust in a relationship after an affair: a story told by both partners, what research says, steps for each of you, and when to get help.
Trust and jealousy · 8 min read- Explained
Weaponized incompetence: what it is, signs, and what to do
What weaponized incompetence means in a relationship, common examples, how it differs from ADHD or a real gap in skills, and how to bring it up.
Mental load · 6 min read - Compare
Couples therapy cost: what you’ll pay, and cheaper options
Couples therapy cost: private practice prices, insurance, sliding scales, EAPs, training clinics, and online options, side by side.
6 min read - Tool
Love language test: a free 20-question quiz for couples
Take our free love language test: 20 quick either-or questions, no email needed. See your result, what it means, and what the research really says.
9 min read
- Stories labeled Couple stories are illustrative: names and details are invented, and each one says so.
- Sources listed Every fact and figure links to where it comes from.
- Experiences, not advice On Venna, couples share what they’ve been through instead of giving advice.
Browse by topic
Pick a topic to see its articles.
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Mental load
“I don’t want to have to ask.” 3 articles -
Arguments
“We always have the same fight.” 3 articles -
Feeling distant
“We’re like roommates.” 2 articles -
Intimacy
“Every hug feels like a request.” 2 articles -
Trust and jealousy
“I forgave, but I don’t trust.” 2 articles -
Money
“My money, your money, our money.” 1 article -
Life changes
“I moved my whole life for your job.” 1 article
Couples’ stories
Illustrative stories told by both partners. Names and details are invented, based on common situations.
- Couple story
Dead bedroom: one couple’s story from both sides
A dead bedroom, told by both partners: the one who wants more and the one who wants less. What research says about desire gaps, and how to start talking.
Intimacy · 8 min read - Couple story
Feeling lonely in a relationship: one couple’s story
Feeling lonely in a relationship? A story told by both partners, what research says, signs it may be depression, and questions to ask each other.
Feeling distant · 8 min read - Couple story
How to rebuild trust in a relationship after an affair
How to rebuild trust in a relationship after an affair: a story told by both partners, what research says, steps for each of you, and when to get help.
Trust and jealousy · 8 min read
Is therapy right for us, or something else?
Private practice, training clinics, sliding-scale networks, online therapy and other couples: what each costs.
Tools and question lists
To use at home, the two of you.
- Questions
36 questions to fall in love: full list and how to use them
All 36 questions to fall in love from Arthur Aron’s 1997 study, in their three sets, plus how the study worked and how couples can use them.
7 min read - Questions
50 questions to ask couples: dinner parties to game night
50 questions to ask couples: fun ones for a dinner party or double date, a game night round, questions for long-time couples, and deeper ones.
6 min read - Questions
60 questions to ask your partner, from fun to deep
60 questions to ask your partner: fun ones, get-to-know-you ones, deep and romantic ones, and a few about your future. Plus five to ask another couple.
6 min read - Tool
Attachment style quiz: 16 questions about how you love
A free attachment style quiz for adults in relationships: 16 questions, scored on anxiety and avoidance, with what your result may mean and what helps.
9 min read - Tool
Compatibility test for couples: 21 statements to answer apart
A free couples compatibility test: you each answer 21 statements on your own, then compare. See where you’re in sync and what’s worth a talk.
9 min read - Tool
Couples quiz: how well do you know your partner?
A free couples quiz: 20 questions to find out how well your partner knows you, with a score, plus a 12-statement relationship check to take together.
8 min read - Tool
Love language test: a free 20-question quiz for couples
Take our free love language test: 20 quick either-or questions, no email needed. See your result, what it means, and what the research really says.
9 min read
Latest
- Explained
Couples therapy: what it is and how to find a good therapist
A plain guide to couples therapy: who does it, the main approaches, what research says about results, what it costs, and how to find a good therapist.
5 min read - Explained
Fair Play cards: what they are and how couples use them
What the Fair Play cards by Eve Rodsky are, how couples use the deck to split household tasks, what it can’t fix, and a simple way to try it at home.
Mental load · 7 min read - Explained
Financial infidelity: examples and how to rebuild trust
What financial infidelity means, examples, how often it happens, why people hide money from a partner, and how couples bring it up and rebuild trust.
Money · 7 min read - Explained
How to save my marriage when you’re the one trying
How to save your marriage when you’re scared, maybe trying alone: first steps, what you can change yourself, what backfires, and when to get help.
Arguments · 8 min read - Explained
Jealousy in a relationship: normal, or a sign of control?
Jealousy in a relationship: how to tell a normal pang from controlling behavior, where it comes from, how to talk about it, and when to get help.
Trust and jealousy · 7 min read - Explained
Long-distance relationship tips: how to stay close
How to make a long-distance relationship work: what research says, how often to talk, visits and costs, trust, date ideas, and a plan to end the distance.
Life changes · 7 min read - Explained
Marriage counseling: types, first session, and going alone
Marriage counseling vs couples therapy, faith-based and premarital options, discernment counseling, the first session, going alone, and when not to go.
7 min read - Explained
Mental load: what it is, examples, and how to share it
The mental load is the work of remembering, planning, and keeping track for a household. Examples, US numbers, signs it’s lopsided, and how to share it.
Mental load · 8 min read - Explained
Roommate syndrome: signs and how couples get out of it
Roommate syndrome is when a couple runs the house well but stops feeling like a couple. Signs, why it happens, and small ways to find each other again.
Feeling distant · 6 min read - Explained
Sexless marriage: why it happens and how to start talking
What counts as a sexless marriage, how common it is, why it happens, and what helps, including how to bring it up and what to do if your spouse won’t talk.
Intimacy · 8 min read - Explained
Stonewalling: meaning, examples, and what to do
What stonewalling means in a relationship, what it looks like, why people shut down mid-fight, how it differs from a break, and how to talk about it.
Arguments · 6 min read - Explained
The Four Horsemen (Gottman) and their antidotes
Gottman’s Four Horsemen in plain English: what criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling sound like, their antidotes, and the research.
Arguments · 8 min read